Dear Waldo

Dear Waldo,

Thank you for babysitting our dog and our house! Here are a few things you should probably know...

1. When you turn the water on, the pipes make a funny high pitched squealing noise - don't worry, the shower is not about to explode...at least it hasn't yet. Also it takes forever for the water to get hot. We recommend turning on the water first, then do your morning poop while it gets warm, then get in the shower.

2. Make sure you close the curtains in the bedroom - otherwise blindingly bright sun will wake you up at about six in the morning.

3. I'm apologizing in advance if our cheerful (interpreted noisy at 6 a.m.) neighborhood birds wake you up - there's nothing I can do about it, but I'm sorry.

4. There is a random black and white cat that will sleep on your car, under our bushes, and just when you think you're getting used to it, he will jump up on the fence by the kitchen window while you're standing at the sink. I think he does it on purpose, but don't worry, no one will know that you just screamed like a girl.

5. Puppy may look at you over the fence while you're outside - don't be alarmed, he's friendly...we think.

6. The glass block window in the bathroom is only sort of see through at night - we tested it. You can tell the person is naked but not anatomical details.

7. Elvis just started this new thing where he stands about two feet in front of you and howls and howls and howls. This usually means he's a) hungry, b) thirsty, c) wants to go outside, d) needs attention, e) forgot what his voice sounds like and got nervous.

8. Elvis is not allowed on the couch.

9. Elvis does not yet realize that he is not allowed on the couch.

10. Elvis gets fed in the afternoon and at night. Usually two cups of food is plenty for an entire day.

11. On Saturday mornings, our neighbor annoyingly pounds on something constantly. We haven't figured out what it is yet.

Thank you again. I went grocery shopping for you tonight since you always complain that we never have cool food to eat...so help yourself to anything in the house.

Gratefully yours,
Jessica and Wil

P.S. Don't drive my dog crazy. - WIL

P.P.S. Elvis is NOT allowed on our bed or in our room. If he pees on the bed, I am holding you personally responsible. ~Jessica :-)